is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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