thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize