dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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