I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
