Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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