At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
