This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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