Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
People in love make me want to vomit
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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