I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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