part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
