its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize