Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
you didnt know i had herpes?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
