The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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