exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm at about main and main street
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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