I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I touched a dick in church today
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
