Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Randomize