Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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