Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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