Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
