Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
