so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
you never un-have a 4some
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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