My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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