He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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