btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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