My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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