There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
