Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
