And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
