this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
