there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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