$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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