Please, let me fuck your mom
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
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