I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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