one two three fourrrrnication!
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
