This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize