it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
