We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
