are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
