We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I look excited, but its just a facade.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize