I love how my cats smell like pot.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
