remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
