is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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