Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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