I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
