We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
