I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
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