"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
