Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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