Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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