That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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