I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
